January 2009 Archives

I'm no stranger to seeing homeless people. I think it's part climate and part economic but since our move to Los Angeles I've seen more homeless people than I ever have (even a dead one). I'm good with the "Don't even ask me for a penny" stare and I have the opportunity to practice it quite often here.

Every once in a while I will give some change or a couple dollars to someone asking for it but for the most part I've been dissappointed in their show of appreciation when I've given up some of my money when they just asked for it. Today while walking into the post office I saw a homeless black man while I was approaching the door and I decided early that I wasn't going to give him any money (especially on account of being asked for it by some punk kid in an alley in Santa Monica only 30 minutes earlier). But when I neared the entrance he noticed my cold stare and silently sort of motioned that he was ok with me not giving him any money and the way he shook his hands and bowed his head when I passed made an impression on me. At the time I didn't think anything of it but at dinner Nicole and I were discussing the economic climate and the less fortunate people and she asked why she was so deserving of having a cell phone and a home phone and internet. My mind immediately raced to the black man in front of the post office who was thankful I even acknowledged him in my cold way.

My heart started breaking for him and I find myself hoping he's got somewhere warm to sleep tonight on account of the projected low being near 40 degrees. I can't shake his soft, harmless but please-just-help-me-out-I'm-starving kind of demeanor and now I'm wondering if he knows he's good at this or if he really is just a guy down on his luck.

I think the old me would immediately assume this was just some act but while volunteering at a homeless shelter in college I had a short conversation with a truly unfortunate sole. It was my job at the homeless shelter to hand out toiletries before shower and bed time and most of the homeless would just line up at my window and wait for their travel size soap, shampoo, toothbrush, toothpaste and towel. I noticed that there were a few guys who always hung out at the perifery of my window until the line had diminished and then most of them would come up and ask for very specific shampoo or toothpaste items (which I wouldn't have had the time to find in the box had they been in line). I recall thinking to myself that beggars shouldn't be choosers until I ran into an Asian man who wasn't three years older than I was. He had on fairly nice clothes and really didn't look like the other homeless guys. After all the picky homeless had cleared he slowly (and shamefully) approached and asked me what I was doing there. I replied it was a requirement for some coursework and he responded that only a few short months ago he was also going to school at the very same university. I realized it was very difficult for him to have to ask for help from one of his peers and he had to clear his chest before he could take the few items from me. He told me about how his family was very poor and very far away and when his home burned down he literally had no where to go and maxed out his credit cards just trying to survive and stay in school. He ended up having to drop out and stay at the homeless shelter in order to get his life back on track. I remember him walking away telling me to be thankful for what I had because it can all be taken away at any moment.

It was this same feeling that the black man in front of the post office gave me today. He wasn't dressed in rags and he didn't make me feel like he felt he was deserving of money like a lot of the other homeless. He seemed to honestly feel bad about asking for it. It makes me sad to think that I did have one last dollar in my pocket and I wouldn't have missed it for a moment but it might have provided him with something to eat.

Now I feel guilty and had Nicole not asked me why she was so deserving of pleasures which I feel are so simple I wouldn't have given him a second thought which makes me feel even more guilty.

This is when religious people pray for the less fortunate and I wonder if sometimes the only reason we pray is to make ourselves feel better.

I hope I have the chance to pass the black man in front of the post office again and let him know I feel for him. May he find a warm place to sleep tonight.

As Americans we've become so lazy that we can't even say popular couples names separately. We smash them together crating a new incredibly rediculous name that isn't unlike these mutts people are breeding and naming them Labradoole and Pugapoo. Since our move to LA I've heard a number of them with the most recent being Heidi and Spencer combined to make Speidi. Wow, who stayed up all night thinking of that one? Shameful.

I've decided to extend my dislike of this need to combine or shorten names and words to every walk of life. Since I purchased my first blackberry years ago I've stopped all the "ur gr8, c u 2morrow" crap because with a full keyboard it's just as easy to type the actual words and I recently decided to never refer to West Hollywood as WeHo. Why? Because I can type (and write) more than ten words per minute and if I did continue to write WeHo it's only a matter of time before I slip up and write WHore instead.

This was actually going to be a post about how most gay men are completely rude and shameless but I couldn't get past titling this post "WeHo". I'll have to save it for another time.

While we were signing the lease of our new West Hollywood apartment we discovered that the apartment doesn't come with a refrigerator. Apparently it's a common occurrence in big cities but still. WTF? Why not provide your tenants a refrigerator? Do they really require that much maintenance? So, we went to Best Buy today to scope out a cheap one which came in around $500 (plus $30 for delivery). Completely unaffordable after we had to pay close to $3000 before we could move in.

While eating my one dollar taquito at El Pollo Loco on a rougher side of town I remembered all the appliance stores in the areas I grew up where they sold used appliances. I figured Los Angeles must have something comparable and it turned out (thanks to Nicole's super amazing iphone) there was a used appliance store two blocks away!

We were in and out in 15 minutes with a used refrigerator that cost us $220 and came with free delivery!! Phew. Now, to just pack the rest of our junk before the moving truck arrives on Monday.

It's hard for me to say that leaving Koreatown for West Hollywood is moving "up" in the world because Koreatown felt like home from the very beginning. I guess part of me really relates to the minorities and working class residents here and leaving feels a little bit like abandonment.

Of course our new apartment will be much nicer, bigger, cleaner, safer, and MUCH closer to work (walking distance, even!). So we have a lot to look forward to in our move but I will really miss our neighbors here. I will miss the nicest property manager I've ever met, Azar, who really helped us get settled in when we first moved. I will miss Sandra, a chatty lady who live across the street and who warned me from the beginning about the dangers of Koreatown. I will miss Jessica and her two dogs, and we will continue to worry about her safety as a single girl in this crazy neighborhood. I will miss our next door neighbor, Claudius, a struggling young actor who hammers nails into his walls at very random intervals, a phenomenon we finally got to the bottom of when he explained that sometimes he just needs another place to hang something so he puts a nail in the wall. I am going to miss Alex and his little sister Alicia more than anything. Alex is a 4 year old little boy that runs up to hug me every time I see him and his baby sister just learned how to say "Oni". I'll miss the little old man that quietly watches the world go by. I'm going to miss Oliver, a student at L.A. highschool on the verge of giving up. I wish there was more I could do to help him stay in school but the last time we spoke he said he probably won't be able to finish since he's about to turn 18 and he still has a lot of credits to make up. Good luck, Oliver, with whatever you do.

Even though our new place will be much more quiet and peaceful I'm going to miss all the life that happens on Oxford avenue below our 4th floor windows. I might even miss being woken up early on the weekends by the guys in their trucks sorting through metal and glass as they prepare to sell it at the recycling centers. I already miss the street vendors and their obnoxious little horns, and the ice cream truck that parks out front with his annoying song repeating over and over. I'll miss the lady who startled me once when she was walking up and down the street shouting "Tamales, Taaamaaaless, agarran los tamales". And oh how we are going to miss the food down here! There are two "roach coaches" that sit on either end of our block with some of the most delicious home made Mexican food. And even though they take up valuable parking spaces, I'm going to miss the fruit trucks that sit on our street.

So Koreatown, it has been a wonderful six months and we will never forget you. Thank you for giving us a place to call home in our new city, we will miss all you had to offer us. Take care of little Alex and Alicia and all the other youngsters who call this place home.